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沉思我给上帝说相声 November 17 为所有的人祝福正因为生命的短暂,所以我们才要努力绽放, 正因为生命的脆弱,所以我们才要使自己变得坚强, 正因为生命充满了磨难,所以我们更要放声歌唱! 在这生命的征途上, 我们也许望的见远方神圣的殿堂, 却看不清身旁,以及应该前进的方向 能感受到的,只有亲人和朋友的臂膀, 能嗅到的,是路旁不起眼的野花散发的芬芳。 是什么,伴随我们度过这几十年的时光? 是什么,能够减轻我们对生命意义的迷茫? 是成就,理想? 还是记忆的行囊?
在这艰难的旅途上, 人海茫茫, 即便只是短暂的同行, 也会留下深刻的印象, 也许你将转身离去, 我们不愿意想你将去向何方, 更愿意相信那是遥远的异乡, 只是在我们的行李里, 会永远留下你带给我们的那份忧伤。 November 09 the light brought by darkness 黑暗带来的光明In Germany, a country famous for its precise, you will be suprised by the facts that the trains are always late and how normal German People think it is. So some times, you will be forced to think the legend maybe a little better than the facts. After getting this idea, it will be easier to take the little troubles on German machines peacefully, like the strange smell when the train runs too fast sometimes or wired noise when the train turning. And several days before, I expirienced the lights turned off for a while on the train. I do not know what is the problem, it is not a big trouble, and only lasted for half a minute. But it happened in the evening, and in the countryside, so it was completely dark in the train, and people became excited about this, some people even whistled. I was also excited a little, for the short new expirience, but without seeing the blond pretties on the train, I feel more peace and could concentrate on the scene outside. It was also dark outside, but if you really concentrate, you can find some lights very far on the mountains. I never found that before, now they became so bright and beautiful, because of the darkness in front of my eyes. We may encounter many bad periods in our life, sometimes we feel hopeless, but if we can calm down and look at further, maybe we can find a light telling us a real way in a far place.
在德国这样一个以守时著称的国家里,你会惊奇的发现,火车几乎总是会迟到的,而最奇特的是,周围的人对此已经习以为常。所以,你不由得会重新审视关于这个国家的一些“惊人”的传说。 当然,这也包括对德国机械的判断。德国的机械质量是优秀的,可是却也不是丝毫没有问题的,如果经常坐火车,就会偶尔碰到一些诸如列车跑快了产生出奇怪的胶皮烧焦的气味,或者火车在弯道变轨是出现奇怪的声音之类的小问题。前些天,我还在火车上碰到了车厢内灯意外熄灭的情况。当时火车正行驶在郊外,是晚上,灯突然毫无征兆的熄灭了,虽然持续的时间不长,可是乘客们却产生了某种类似于历险的兴奋,有人甚至吹起了口哨。我也有点兴奋,可是更多的是在黑暗中感受到了一种沉静。没有了车厢内满是金发美女的视觉诱惑,世界仿佛突然清静了许多,眼前一片漆黑,迫使我向窗外望去,当我的瞳孔像我的心一样向外面打开的时候,我看到了田里山上远处的点点灯光。我从没有注意过,或者看到过德国乡下的夜晚,原来有这样的灯,或者它们是因为这意外的黑暗,突然变得夺目而且映射出一种令人沉静的光晕。 我们在一生中,常常会陷入一些令人绝望的阶段,迷茫和无助织成的黑暗将我们紧紧包裹住,短暂的磨练是一种挑战,会让我们兴奋,长期的锤炼却会成为一种灾难,可是如果我们能够静下心来,审视自己,眺望远方,也许就能看到指引我们的灯光。 当眼前一片漆黑,你还有远方,那里有黑暗带来的光明。
November 01 working hard 努力工作When I was a child, studied in elementary school,middle and high middle school, even in university, I studied very hard, compare to what I can do now. I did not take any weekends, never sleep before 00:00, spent 16 hours in school or in front of the desk on studying. I felt happy about that life. I complained, of course, even very often, but I never give up working harder. Although my rank in my class is getting lower and lower, I always thought I am good, I still have potential.
Then I went to ITP, where I first have the right to deal with my time by myself. Then I start to think I also need weekend to have a rest, I do not want to work in the evening, although I did not do that. I heard people in Europe do not work so hard, they have the whole weekend, and working after 18:00 is not eve allowed by law in some countries. So when I got the offer from Europe, I thought I will enjoy my life.
But I found I can not finish my task on time, alwasy. Until my supervisor told me we need to work at least for 70 hours per week if we want to do some nice work in Science, I just know, what is the problem about. I am too lazy here. I go to my wife's place very often, on the train to there, I can see the students studying on the train very often, they are afraid of awasting even one minute, and this is totally opposite to my impression I got before I came here. It is the first time I found I am so scared when I notice I still need to work in the weekend and in the evening, I can not imagine how to survive in that kind of life, which I have done for about 20 years. Maybe I am old, I am becoming coward now.
I am used to confused why it is so hard for our country to catch up with western developed countries even if we have so many people working very hard in their field, now I know the answer, and it is quite easy: people here are also working hard.
Come on! For our country!
记得上学那会儿,自己是很刻苦的,周末在做题看书,晚上也在做题看书,十二点之前很少睡觉,到现在我还清楚的记得当初央视首播《水浒》的时候我是以多大的意志力忍住不看电视剧而去看书的。还有准备物理竞赛那会儿,整个暑假我都没有休息过,全身心的投入到竞赛试题上,却也不亦乐乎。这种刻苦的劲头,我一直坚持到大学,我还记得大家晚上扇着吊扇等着传达的老大爷十一点半来自习室用纯正的济南话喊上一声:到点咧~!后来上研究生之后,也有保安在十二点的时候去办公室来催,但那时,大家大多是在看电影,聊天,很少有人是在工作了。不过我大部分时间都是在实验室度过的,由于被实验绑架,所以不得不晚上也工作,甚至通宵工作,周末也工作。可是那时我就在不停的幻想,要是能周末毫无负罪感的休个周末,完上也不用工作(顺便提一下,我们当时的组会都是在晚上的),该有多好!所以后来确定要来欧洲的时候,我想,我的苦日子终于到头了!
听说欧洲人工作极为不努力,周末都是雷打不动的,晚上是绝不加班的。我来之后,也确实身体力行了很一段时间,可是我发现工作我总是不能及时做完,来了一年,也没有什么像样的结果出来。直到后来老板告诉我,要想真正的科研上做出点像样的工作来,一周没有至少70小时的工作时间,基本是不可能的,我才看到,我表现的太懒了。
其实德国人很多工作还是很努力的,因为去老婆那里的缘故,经常会作火车,在火车上我经常看到有学生在看文章,有的没有座位,甚至会坐在地上复习功课,看到他们,我仿佛想起自己小时候打吊针也会坚持学习的感觉来。那种曾经如此习以为常并且引以为豪的生活学习作风,如今想起来,竟然让我有些害怕了,我第一次发现我的冲劲在一次次的挫折中减弱了,我开始变得软弱,失去信心,害怕接受挑战,害怕充满压力的生活环境,不能忍受艰苦的生活,我在变老么?我头一次感受到我快三十岁了,头一次对年龄的增长产生了忧虑。
以前,我总是很奇怪,为什么我们的雇员,研究人员数量那么大,工作那么刻苦,我们却很难赶超西方发达国家,现在我才明白,答案其实很简单,因为人家工作也很努力。
各位,再加把劲儿吧,为了我们的祖国!(有时候发现这句从小就喊得口号却是所有支撑自己的动力中最有力量的一个)
下面的照片就是在火车上学习的一个学生,各位,欧洲人也很努力的:
October 23 second-hand stuff 二手货I became addict to second-hand stuff these days. Only because it is cheap.
Seveal years ago, I did not even want to touch a thing used by other people. That is because I still lived as a student and I know I can take everything back to home finally. But now, we have founded our own family here and will go back in several years which means we will have to left most of our things here. If we buy new one, like we spent 400 Euros on a TVset, we will lost at least 300 when we leave because you can not sell a second-hand TVset with a price higher than 150 Euros.
My wife does not like this, I can understand this. I wont make my life full of second-hand stuff, like I will never use a second-hand underware. But for something, like bike, lamp or something like this, it is OK. honestly, sometimes, I even found I became addict to second-hand stuff. The full process is interesting.
Usually, we look for the second-hand information on some BBS, it is not like a shop or TaoBao where all the stuffs have been classified, on the BBS, all the things are mix up. So you have to find where the things you want are, or you read the messages and check if there are something you need. It is not for sure you will be able to find the thing you want, but some times you can get things you need but did not expect. It is like a snake waiting for its quarry on the tree, it is waiting for a frog, but a rat comes. It can give you some feeling like surprise.
Several weeks ago, my wife and I went to another city to buy two bikes in the second-hand market, then we tried to come back by bike, we almost did it! But finally, we gave up, because we found we are running on a very undirect way, we spend 4 hours on 15 straight kms distance. We were really tired that day, but we were very happy because we passed many little villages and saw many new things, we even saw a wedding that day in one village!(AD: all the photos are in my album of this blog)
So buying second-hand stuff benifits life not only because of the low price, but also the process of buying can be a good memory in the life some times. And we are still students now, not a rich man, this is a acceptable way to improve our life, and often brings some special experience to us, why do not we open our mind and enjoy it?
Now, I am searching for a PSP, hehe.
我发现我对买二手上瘾了。
要放以前,我是根本不会想买二手的东西的,小时候别人碰过的筷子我都不用,怎么可能买别人用过的东西?可是时移世易,来到这边,有时候不得不考虑买些二手的东西应急。这里毕竟只是一个过路的地方,东西买多了将来带不走就全浪费了,比如如果买台新的电视机(我没说我要买啊)要至少300多欧,但是再卖二手的话,也许就只能卖150,甚至更少。这么一想,两三年的光景,凭空就少了150欧元,实在是舍不得。所以二手货便成为一个好的选择。
但是我老婆对这个买卖可是不太感兴趣,这点我当然理解,我也不会什么都买二手的,比如内裤,打死我也不会买二手的。但是有些东西,比如微波炉,自行车,就无所谓啦,对于我这种喜欢占小便宜的“抠门”二手货自然是上好的选项。
其实我喜欢买二手也不光是价格问题,有时候觉得这也像一个休闲方式一样。买二手的东西基本都是在论坛里面自己找,不像在商店或者淘宝之类的商品非常全而且已经分好类了,在论坛里,需要一个帖子一个帖子的找,更多的时候是在碰。这感觉就像趴在树上等待猎物的蛇,也许想捉只青蛙,却等来了老鼠。有时候你想找个微波炉,却发现有人在卖一个很便宜的台灯,然后突然发现自己确实需要一个台灯,这时候就会有阵小小的惊喜。有时候看看大家在论坛里讨价还价,各出妙语,也别有一番乐趣。所以,买二手货有时候还真不在于那个物品,买的过程可能更有意思。
我跟老婆前几周去另一个城市买了两辆二手自行车,然后我们决定骑车回来,一路上跋山涉水,路过了无数小村庄,数次在小河和田地里穿行,最后却发现走的是一条非常不是直线的路径,5个小时,我们在向马堡方向走了15公里,只好放弃了。虽然累个半死,整个过程却非常有趣和难忘,我们看到了很多在火车上和大路上看不到的风景,经过了很多恬静的小镇,甚至看到了一对新人在举行婚礼,这些都成为了我们美好的回忆。如果买的新车,也许我们就不舍得在那些吭吭娃娃的路上颠簸了。(这次的途中拍了很多照片,都在相册里了,呵呵,悄悄广告一下)
前段时间我又在买游戏手柄的时候免费得到了毛笔,墨块和砚台,这些,可是花钱也很难买到的啊,但是有了笔墨,我们就可以多练练字,平复一下平时紧张的心情。而且,这在我买手柄的时候,根本没有料到,完全是意外的惊喜。
所以说,二手不光是价格低,本身也带给了我们一种新的生活体验,如果我们主动的尝试一下,并且感受其中的乐趣,我们的生活就会增添不少有趣的插曲。而且作为学生, 我还穷得很,只要不是沉迷于此,天天泡在论坛里蹲点等东西,为什么不尝试一下呢?
下一步,我在考虑是不是时机合适的时候入手一台psp或者汉王电纸之类的呢!
October 05 goujian,zhuyuanzhang and playboy 卧薪尝胆的勾践,要饭的朱元璋 和 色情杂志After I came to Germany, I found I start to be interested in history novels and TVserious.
I watched the TV: king of Yue,Gou Jian; read the book: the stories happened in Ming.
I found all the Great People will bear a lot of things first. OK, this is not my discovery, almost everyone can tell this, but how many people really understand it?
Gou Jian used to be a slave in Wu, he pulled the car like a horse, he low himself to be a stair when Fu Chai come down from the car, he even taste Fu Chai's shit, even after doing this, it is still possible for him to be killed any time. After he go back to his country, he waited 20 years for his country recovering from the war. Finally he beat Wu and got everything back.
Zhu Yuanzhang's life is not much better than Guo Jian. He need not to taste other's shit, but his parents died very early, he has to be a monk, beg for food from other people in oder to survive.
Many people, especially the youth, will say in their mind, that is not so hard! I can also do that, in order to revenge and be remembered in the history, I can also pretend to be a slave, even more than 3 years, in order to survive to be a emperor, I can also beg for food on the street, anyway, no ones knows me, it is not even a problem!
I absolutely believe there will be some people say these kind of words, maybe the details are different, but in summary, they all think they can beat any difficulties, they are not so successful only because they do not have a chance. Their common property is that the harder other people told them one thing is, the more confiendence they will have.
Qian Zhongshu said: when we are young, we always confused our ability with our passion.
we saw many fresh students go to the insititute under older students' dissuasion and then awaste their 3 or 5 years time because of some unexpected difficulties. Maybe you will think difficulty is from begging for food or being a slave, because it seems the problem of the following two is losing face. It is not ture. Some one use to do a experiment, he ask 40 men to piss in their trousers and promiss them that no else will know it, but finally, no one can make it. You need not only fight with others' comments, but also your own mind. It is the same to pretenting to be a slave of others or begging for food.
Before I went back to China last month, I want to take a PlayBoy for a friend as a gift, there are many porn journals in some book shop, I found it is very difficut to stand close to that shelf, and pay the cashier's, no one will laugh at you or disdain you in front of you, and it is totally legal, but for me, it is really difficult to do it. I do not know you, you can try.
出国后,发现越发的喜欢中国的历史。在这边看了一些历史小说和电视剧,例如《明朝那些事儿》,《越王勾践》以及《汉武大帝》。从这些历史事件中,越发的体会到要成大事先要受磨练的道理。尤其是前两个例子中,朱元璋起事之前真是三教九流啥都做过,要饭算是流传比较广的,而越王勾践更是为了保国复仇屈尊去吴国为奴,为吴王夫差做过骖马,脚蹬,甚至还尝了夫差的大便,即便这样还要整日担心被杀,他在吴国用了三年的时间换取吴王的信任,回国之后又等了二十年休养生息,终于使越国再次强大,灭吴复仇。这样忍辱负重,在绝望中寻找希望的例子历史上很多,大家都明白的道理,可是未必都真的理解。
很多人,尤其是我们年轻人(这个句子真难写,不加“我们”怕人说我故作高深,加上“我们”又怕被拍充小装嫩),经常初生牛犊不怕虎,浑身上下都是明知山有虎偏向虎山行的英雄胆。在很多人眼里,周围人所谓的困难根本不值一提,是他们太过无能造成的,朱元璋上街要饭有什么难的,现在满大街不都是要饭的么,只要拉下脸来就行了,反正谁也不认识谁。至于越王勾践屈身为奴,为了复仇大计,临时装装估计也没什么难的,夜深人静的时候想象复仇之后的淋漓畅快,三年随随便便就忍过去了。他们不曾认真体会劝谏者所说的困难,他们的共同特点就是,别人告诉他们一件事非常难,他们反而觉得很有挑战性,越发的感兴趣,同时在心理还暗暗的鄙视一把劝阻者,把他们划到俗人的类别里。他们心中,豪情万丈,信心十足,唯缺一个机会。我看到很多师弟师妹,在师兄的劝阻之下义无反顾地冲进了他们不该去的实验室和学术领域,然后再遇到了变态的小老板之后心灰意冷,抱怨上天不公,消沉下去,浪费自己的大好时光。
钱钟书先生说:年轻的时候,我们容易把自己的创作激情当作自己的创作能力。
有人说,克服困难和要不要脸不是一回事儿,要饭和作奴隶在某种程度上说,只要不要脸了就会容易很多。可是问题就在于,要想决定不要脸,本身就是件很困难的事情。有人曾经作过一个心理学实验:把四十个男人分开关在屋子里,要求他们不脱裤子直接撒尿,并且保证此事决不会有第三个人知道——如果他们尿成了的话,结果发现,根本没有人能做到这一点。可见平时我们所接受的教育对我们行为的约束力有多大。前段时间回国之前,我想买本《花花公子》带给一个老朋友作礼物,在这边很多书店就有个书架摆放的全是各种露骨的色情杂志,我发现要想在那个架子旁边站着翻会儿书真是非常困难,当你拿着书去结帐的时候更是恨不得找个缝钻进去。可是,绝对没有人会当面笑话你,或者露出鄙视的神色,所有的障碍完全都在自己的心里。其内心体会,大致相当于20岁左右的时候去买安全套,大家可以想像一下。
如果你还是觉得没什么困难的而且你有恰好在国外,你可以亲自去尝试一下。
下面是我在书店拍的杂志封面照片,最后那张就是大名鼎鼎的反华杂志《明镜》,同是禁刊,从照片的清晰程度上却能看出我拍摄时紧张程度的差别。
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